Wednesday, March 30, 2011
10. Manny Ramirez will show up to White Sox opening day because even he forgot he signed with the Rays.
9.Jose Bautista will not repeat his dream season due to the fact that Vernon Wells is no longer around to give him his special 'power bars'
8.Tim Lincecum will finally get all those jokes everyone keeps making about his last name. OR: Similar to the Mitchell Report-Tim Lincecum will release a list of every player he has ever smoked up with.
7. To make a statement, 20,000 Expos fans will head to DC to make their presence known at a Nationals game-5,000 will instantly head home due to the fact that it's not 1$ hot dog night.
6.After years of decision making, Phil Coke will sign a sponsorship deal with Coca Cola, who narrowly beat out the entire country of Columbia.
5.To outdo the Yankees, the Rays will make Johnny Damon shave all of his body hair right before his first at bat.
4.After an off-season of English lessons, the Yankees second baseman will let everyone know that his last name is actually pronounced 'Canoe'
3. Due to pressure from the front office Ron Halliday will get his PhD-adhering to the Phillies' 'literal nickname' policy.
2. Albert Pujols will cause an uproar when he gets rid of his batting gloves and starts using the 'Moises Alou Method' for grip.
1.The MLB will retire Youppi's Exclamation Mark.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Fact-The Montreal Canadiens have been shut out in 3 straight games.
Fact-It's so sad, it's kind of funny.
Fact-Alaska is close to breaking up with Scott Gomez.
The Habs haven't scored in a while-I've started the Habs Goal Pool to get some entertainment out of the whole ordeal.
Leave a comment with your thoughts on when you think the Habs will score the next goal, bonus points for who scored it.
The winner gets a beer on me.
My Prediction: 13:35 into the first period-Scored by Lars Eller
MetricJulie:4th minute into tonight's game.
MeredithBedard: 9:27 into the first period-scored by James Wisniewki
Mechant_Mangeur: 44 seconds into the game-scored by Brian Gionta
MrBeersNYR: November 3rd 2011 8:23 PM-Most realistic prediction?
MattMarleau: 9 minutes into the 1st period of tonight's game.
Tareq: Minute 13 of the 1st
PK Arctic: 1:23 of the 1st period
Lang_2727: 7:00 into the first period-scored by Scott Gomez
KoolKeith19: 8:46 in the 1st period-scored by Brian Gionta
CyberCarotte: 11 minutes into the 1st period-scored by Tomes Plekanec
Jorge Eduardo Chaparro: 16 minutes into the 2nd period-scored by Hal Gill
FlirtyJo: 8:02 of the first period
HeyMyNameIsWill: 8:42 of the first period scored by Tomas Plekanec
mrd1808: 18:10 into the first period
R_G_HOUSE: 8:52 left in the first period-scored by Brian Gionta assisted by Scott Gomez
RichardObrand: 7:42 into the first-scored by Mike Cammalleri
NastyKnate: 3:42 into the first perid-scored by PK Subban from James Wisniewski and Tomas Plekanec-on the Powerplay
JimmyCorp: 45 seconds into the first period
HaraniT: 14:00 into the first period-Scored by P.K. Subban
__Danno: 3:33 of the 1st period-Scored by Hal Gill
Max_Habs: 2:00 into the second period-Scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
SeanRCampbell: 5:10 into the second period-Against Carolina
tec4_Cleveland: 8:21 into the second period-Scored by David Desharnais
cdiraddo: 2:00 into the first period
Blockersave93: 16:00 into the first period-Scored by Paul Mara on the Powerplay
HabsGirl4Life: 6:00 into the 2nd period-Scored by Benoit Pouliot
rgolteez: 9:00 into the first period-Scored by Brian Gionta
lbass007: 1:00 into the first period
Kuyaz: 11:21 into the first period-scored by Scott Gomez assisted by Brian Gionta
AnneLaur: 3:43 into the first period-Scored by Brian Gionta
TomPalko: 2:00 into the first period-Scored by Travis Moen
anxnguyen: 6:00 into the second period-Scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
HabItHerWay: 7:08 of the first period-Scored by Ryan White
Jess: 7:36 into the first perod-Scored by Tomas Plekanec
habsfan21: 8:08 into the first period-Scored by James Wisniewski
LadyHabs: 4:15 into the first period-Scored by P.K. Subban
GreyKnutson: 11:11 in the first period-scored by Scott Gomez
NMakris: 7:31 left in the first period-Scored by Brian Gionta
MatJacobson: 12:20 into the first period scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
bsimco: 3:25 into the 2nd period-Tomas Plekanec will be involved
robi90: 5:06 of the first period-Scored by Mathieu Darche
Bandit132: 5:45 in the first period
TeepRock: 7 minutes into the 1st period-Scored by Benoit Pouliot
JoeT_GBA: 8:21 of the second period-Scored by Michael Cammalleri on the Powerplay
DBlye: 12:35 into the first period-Scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
Robert Shaps: 11:01 into the 1st period-Scored by Brian
ivanessat: 13:06 of the second period-Scored by Mike Cammalleri
habsfollow: 3:30 into the first period-Scored by Mike Cammalleri
Bensucks: 15:28 of the first-Scored by Tomas Plekanec
Habsobserver: 7:00 of the first-Scored by Tomas Plekanec
DustinG: 4:00 into the first period-Scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
Habsfan4ever: 2:21 into the first period-Scored by Mike Cammalleri
Somesuperhotchick: 12:27 into the first period-Scored by PK Subban
BigSee80: 5:00 into the first-Scored by Mathieu Darche
ArponBasu: 11:17 into the first-Scored by Andrei Kostitsyn
EricEngels: 3:00 minutes into the first period-Score by Tomas Plekanec
BradBernhardt: 5:23 in the first-Scored by Brian Gionta
Touteparpillee: 16:27 in the first period-Scored by Benoit Pouliot
RiRi2514: 8:25 into the first-Scored by Brian Gionta
Habsfan324: 17:57 into the first-Scored by James Wisniewski
RagingLogan: 5:50 into the first-Scored by Paul Mara
Sir Gary Thomas: 9:45 into the first period.
MarkovHabFan79: 12:00 into the first period-Scored by Brian Gionta
Scotty 89: 5:24 into the first period-Scored by David Desharnais
DrDougMartin: 10:00 into the first period-Scored by Mike Cammalleri
ElJayHabs: 11:00 into the first period-Scored by Brian Gionta
TheTonyJones: 7:37 of the second period-Scored by Scott Gomez
Habziefan09: 5:00 into the first period-Scored by Scott Gomez
Simon Booth: 7:00 into the first period-Scored by Tomas Plekanec
Noah_McCabe:2:32 into the first period-Scored by Benoit Pouliot
JaredBook: 4:32 of the second period-Scored by Travis Moen
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
9. Rodeo Clown
8. GSP's punching bag
7. Movie floor cleaner-tongue only
6. Rebecca Black song listener
5. Don Cherry NHL name translator
4. Urinal cake taster
3.Host of the new reality show 'beat the crao out of the host of this show'
2. Mario Leimieux ass-kisser
1. Gary Bettman's personal booster seat
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
If you’ve been following me for the past year and a bit you know that I never stray into the analytical side of things. I like to leave the commentary to the experts and choose to take a comedic approach to the Montreal Canadiens and the NHL as a whole.
I am going to post my thoughts on the Chara/Pacioretty incident and just this once cross over into the more serious side of blogging.
By now you have seen the hit from every angle; I am not going to talk about the hit.
I am going to talk about the result; I am going to talk about the health of Max Pacioretty.
What bothers me about the verdict that the NHL passed on to Chara is simply based on the fact that Max Pacioretty is still in the hospital. He will undergo serious therapy for the coming months, and will most likely never be the same player and person once he has ‘recovered’ from this ordeal. Zdeno Chara will continue on with his life as if nothing happened.
As far as I know Zdeno Chara never apologized for the incident. He stated that the incident was ‘unfortunate’, which is in no way shape or form an apology. I have no relationship with Zdeno Chara, I don’t know what he is like away from a Hockey rink, but I hope to God that he is losing sleep over this situation.
Zdeno Chara put a 23 year old kid who was just breaking into the NHL in the hospital. Whether or not it was done with intent is debatable, but at the end of the day whether or not Max Pacioretty plays another Hockey game is still in question.
I feel terrible for Max Pacioretty. I feel cheated the Zdeno Chara’s actions went unpunished-not because of the intent, but because of the result. Not from a Hockey perspective, but from a personal perspective. I’m not going to get into how the NHL justice system works; I am just stating that as a human being I feel like Zdeno Chara NEEDS to experience consequences for his actions.
I know life isn’t fair, and Zdeno Chara being able to celebrate with his teammates after goals, after winning games, after winning playoff rounds…is simply the height of unfairness.
Did the NHL drop the ball by not giving Chara any kind of punishment? I’ll leave that to the experts, I simply cannot give an objective opinion on the matter.
I know the NHL cannot give suspensions based on the fact that it is ‘the right thing to do’, but Max Pacioretty will never be the same again and it is Zdeno Chara’s fault.
Regardless of intent.
Go Max Pacioretty Go
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Before we get into things-good vibes for Max Pacioretty.
Holy Crap-Hal Gill is a sniper! Here are some other things you didn't know about him.
10. Frequently uses Scott Gomez as a pillow.
9. Does not know why the team is called the Sabres, but their logo is a Buffalo.
8. His family pressured him to be a basketball player, but stereotypically; he can’t jump.
7. Thinks that P.K. stands for ‘Pretty Kool’
6. Still a firm believer that Zdeno Chara is some kind of mythical creature.
5. Has no idea why God frequently announces updates during games.
4. Used Pierre McGuire as a Q-tip once.
3. The King’s Speech is loosely based off of Hal Gill’s life.
2. Does both voices in the Dagwoods 5 after 5 commercial. True story.
1. Thinks that ‘Titanic’ is a documentary.