Well, it’s mid August and we can safely say that the worst off-season since 2004-2005 (get it?) is coming to an end. With only one major free agent on the block, then off the block, then back on the block again the summer has been as boring and confusing as a post game interview with Andrei Kostitsyn. While there were some semi-exciting moments (The Thrashers becoming the messed up cloning experiment of the Blackhawks, the Leafs acquiring forwards people have heard of etc.) the Summer of 2010 was not the best summer for Hockey fans. In Montreal, we got our summer off to a bang with the trading of Halak, but after that it’s as if Gauthier was like “K, the rest can wait until September, where’s my 9 Iron?”
While Gauthier didn’t seem busy he was actually deep in all the business one would expect to be deep in while running an NHL team.
How do I know this?
Well I was walking past the Bell Centre yesterday, and I found a Blackberry on the street. After spending three hours figuring out how to use it I realized that it belonged to Pierre Gauthier. I gave it back, but not before going through the texts and BBMs...and trying to use it as leverage to land a spot as the Habs ‘Director of Watching Games With Great Seats’. He turned me down, and as payback I’m posting what
I witnessed.
Enjoy!
Actual excerpts from Pierre Gauthier’s Blackberry
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Text to 514-444-2388 Jaro H - 5-25-10
Don’t worry about Halak k? I know he had a good run with us but you’re our guy moving forward.
Text from 514-444-2388 – Jaro H 5-25-10
WTF?
Text to 514-444-2388 Jaro H - 5-25-10
OOPS! Sent to wrong number, jk!
...
...
...
Text to 514-321-3131-Pricey – 5-25-10
Don’t worry about Halak k? I know he had a good run with us but you’re our guy moving forward.
Text to 514-321-6755- Pricey – 5-25-10
Also avoid calls from Halak.
BBM Conversation with PIN 51W9Q11M-Guy Boucher~In Hamilton
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Hey Guy, want to meet later in the week? We want to talk to you about coaching up here.
Guy Boucher~In Hamilton: Wow, what are you doing with Jacques?
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Um, nothing? You’d be assistant coach.
Guy Boucher~In Hamilton: Oh.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Is that a problem? I know you’ve been talking to some other teams and I want you to know we value you here and want you to stay here.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: I mean, we brought you in from the Q, we gave you full reign of the B club...we want you to continue to grow with us.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: I just want to make sure we’re on the same page here.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: You there?
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: PING!
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Did that work? Do you actually type ‘ping’ or is there another way to do it?
Guy Boucher~In Hamilton: I’m here...was just on the phone.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Did you get my BBMs?
Guy Boucher~In Tampa Bay: Yeah got em.
Pierre Gauthier~4th place!: Oh ok cool...hey what the eff!
Guy Boucher is unavailable.
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Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
Good news Sergei! We’re trading you!
Text from: 514-747-7474- Sergei K
Da?
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
What?
Text from 514-174-7474- Sergei K
I trade?
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
Yes! I e-mailed like 50 teams and I managed to squeeze Dustin Boyd an
Text from 514-174-7474- Sergei K
What?
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
D Dan Ellis from Nashville! You’re heading to Nashville!
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
That first one wasn’t finished did you get the second one?
Text from 514-174-7474- Sergei K
Ver is Nahville?
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
Why are you texting with an accent?
Text from 514-174-7474- Sergei K
I trade? Yes?
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
YES! To Nashville. For Dustin Boyd and Dan Ellis.
Text from 514-174-7474- Sergei K
Dey not superstars. I worth more. You lose.
Text to 514-174-7474- Sergei K
No Sergei...I win.
BBM conversation with Doug Armstrong~STLGM
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : Ok so want to start up talks again?
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: Yeah, I’m interested.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : Ok, I’ve had tons of offers for Halak, so the offer better be good.
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: Ok we’re prepared to offer big, but we have a list of untouchables. Players be ABSOLUTELY cannot part with.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall :( : Who’s on the list?
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: I’m not even going to tell you. These players are essential to the organization and I can’t afford to lose them.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall :( : Well they must be pretty good players then.
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: The best.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : Can I see the list?
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: There’s no point, I’m not moving them.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : I just want to see them, this is Halak we’re talking about.
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: Ok fine. Only 2 players are on it. I am absolutely not trading them to you.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : If you’re trying to make me want them it’s not working...
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: Why would I want you to want them. They’re not moving.
Pierre Gauthier~27th Overall:( : Just...who are they?
Doug Armstrong~STLGM: Lars Eller and Ian Schultz.
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Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Hey Pierre, Available for a chat?
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: I don’t know...you going to try and steal anyone else?
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: I already apologized, and you told me your wife loved the fruit basket.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: I know, just no funny stuff. What’s up?
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM! : Well, I was wondering if you want to make a move, we want a goalie.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: I tried to trade Price for Vinny already, the old guy wouldn’t do it. Can’t do it now though, with Halak gone.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Oh yeah...great trade by the way!
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: Wha—thanks! I’ve been getting heat.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Don’t know why...genius of a deal.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: You’re too kind.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: I know, anyways I want Cedric Desjardins.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: Hm, I don’t know. He’s a solid player, was great for the bulldogs last year, we don’t really know what he’s capable of yet, we want to groom him.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: but I want him. We’ll give you Kari Ramo. Solid Finnish Tender, NHL experience.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: Ramo eh? Well....he’s got talent.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Way better than Desjardins. I want to take him off your hands as a favour to you.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: What?
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: I heard Desjardins is a bad goalie.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: Well, who said that? He was one of the best goalies in the AHL last year.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Nono, you’re thinking of someone else.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: I’m thinking of someone else? You mean someone other than the person we’re talking about?
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Yes. I’m Steve Yzerman...would I lie to you?
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: I guess not.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: I’ll have the paperwork drawn up.
Pierre Gauthier~Signing Price-still here though: Sounds good! You’re a nice guy Steve, thanks for this.
Steve Yzerman~LYghtningGM!: Don’t mention...you owe me one though!
I found more on the phone, they’ll be released if there is a demand.
Summer Vacation is over, Habs Laughs is back!
A comedic take on the Montreal Canadiens. Seriously.
