Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Things Carey Price Has Learned While Playing 15 Out Of 16 Games

A lot can change from season to season eh?

I’m not going to go over what the Habs have done in the past 5-6 months to get to where they are now…but the major aspect that has re-tooled this team was the Jaroslav Halak trade.

The subject has been beat to death, but the way I see it is…while we lost Jaroslav Halak, we gained Ian Schultz, Lars Eller, Tomas Plekanec…and of course the renewed and refreshed Carey Price.

He pretty much had a year off last season so maybe that’s why he’s so well rested these days. I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and go with ‘confidence and natural talent’ as the reasons that he’s carrying a good chunk of this Hockey team.

Last season I did a piece that went over the ‘Things Carey Price has Learned/Noticed While Riding The Bench. You can find it here :


Now that he’s dominating crease time, I think it’s only fair to revisit the subject from the opposite point of view.

Here are the Things Carey Price Has Learned/Noticed While Playing 15 Out Of 16 Games.

-Josh Gorges has a great ass. Hal Gill needs to tighten his up a bit.

-Whenever someone scores on me a big red light goes on. It’s like God is letting everyone know that I messed up.

-The pre-game intro really puts a damper on the fact that we’re trying to NOT tell everyone that we’re superheroes.

-When you look at him from 200 feet away, Zdeno Chara kind of looks like a human being and not like 3 people standing on top of each other...who is also ugly as hell.

-TV time outs are a great time to vote for myself for first star!

-You can easily substitute your water for any clear liquid and everyone will still think its water! I drank Diet Cream Soda against the Canucks and Miso Soup against the Hurricanes!

-There’s a dude with season tickets who sits right behind the net that looks exactly like my Dentist….that would explain the ‘Carey I’m your Dentist’ sign he keeps bringing.

-Between whistles I always think of witty things to say that are coincidentally 140 characters or less. I wish there was a free forum in which to express these thoughts to the world.

-What happened to the Hostess from 2 years ago? She was awesome. What job is better than hosting 2 minute long game shows for mediocre prizes? Also, why can’t they just hire a full time host? It’s never the same person twice. The fans need consistency.

-That ‘crush your head’ thing from Kids In The Hall pisses the crap out of opposing team’s goalies.

-I don’t understand why the fans chant ‘REY-CA’ whenever I do something positive.

-Halak carved his name on the inside of the right post. With some editing it now reads ‘Boom ShaHalaka’.

-Contrary to what everyone says about me, P.K. Subban is as close to Jesus as the Habs are going to get.

-Jeff Halpern looks exactly like Mike Komisarek.

-What happened to the young Travis Moen and Tommy Pyatt from the pre-game video? They were totally awesome then…

-The PhD line has a degree from McGill, Princeton, and a 4th overall draft pick on it. I wonder if McGill and Princeton regret taking Darche and Halpern too.

-On slow nights I like to play ‘The Social Network’ in my head but I sub myself in for the Winklevoss twins. Wouldn’t it be awesome if there were two of me?

-You don’t even know how bad Josh Gorges wants in on me and P.K’s post win handshake.

-I let the Lightning win in OT. We got a point out of it and it gave Guy Boucher some solace in the fact that he has to hang out with Dan Ellis every day.

-Remember that game I invented with Lapierre and Haiti? Well I invented a new one: Every time the fans don’t boo me I devote another year to the Canadiens franchise. Right now I’m locked up until 2026.


  1. This is even better then the other Carey post! Lol I love the boom shahalaka one and Voting for himself for the three stars and substituting his water lmao. I think everyone on the team wants in on the PK-Carey victory handshake.

  2. Brilliant.
    "The PhD line has a degree from McGill, Princeton, and a 4th overall draft pick on it. I wonder if McGill and Princeton regret taking Darche and Halpern too."

  3. Words don't even begin to describe how brilliant this is. Cream Soda was a good choice. Its a good thing that our young goalie is learning and developing into a more mature and sophisticated human being.